Getting Older And The Menopause
A reduced sex drive is not an inevitable part of ageing, but it’s something many men and women experience as they get older.
There can be many reasons for this, including:
- lower levels of sex hormones just before, during and after the menopause in women
- lower levels of sex hormone in men
- age-related health problems, including mobility problems
- side effects of medicine
Speak to a GP if you’re concerned about this. They may ask about any other symptoms you have, and sometimes they may arrange for a blood test to check your hormone levels.
There are treatments to increase hormone levels if low levels are causing problems, such as hormone replacement therapy with or without testosterone treatment for women going through the menopause.
Anxiety Can Lower Your Libido
Anxious feelings can sink your sex drive in a number of ways. That overwhelmed feeling you get when anxiety kicks in can railroad sexy thoughts out of your brain, preventing you from being in the mood even if you were raring to go earlier in the day.
Panic and worry also have a physical effect on your body, ramping up the production of stress hormones like adrenaline that make you feel on edge. When your body can’t physically relax, reveling in sexual sensations and getting close to a big O is going to be a lot more difficult.
And then there’s the libido-lowering side effect of certain medications used to treat anxiety, says Steinberg. She calls it an unfortunate catch-22: the drugs which help keep the condition from getting worse also tend to decrease your interest in getting it on.
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Causes Of Anxiety Fear And Panic
There are many different causes of anxiety, fear or panic and it’s different for everyone.
When you’re feeling anxious or scared, your body releases stress hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol.
This can be helpful in some situations, but it might also cause physical symptoms such as an increased heart rate and increased sweating. In some people, it might cause a panic attack.
Regular anxiety, fear or panic can also be the main symptom of several health conditions. Do not self-diagnose speak to a GP if you’re worried about how you’re feeling.
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Signs Of Sexual Anxiety
Sexual anxiety will frequently manifest with physiological symptoms that impact sexual functioning. One might experience an inability to achieve an erection, or the erection may be weak and inconsistent. Some may experience near immediate ejaculation upon stimulation or lack of ability to ejaculate, particularly with a partner. Vaginal lubrication may be insufficient to allow for penetration, or penetration may result in pain or discomfort.1
Many of the physiological symptoms described above may be a function of an undiagnosed medical condition, hormonal changes, or typical aging therefore, standard of care often dictates a medical evaluation to rule out a possible medical explanation for the concern. Even with a medical antecedent, however, psychological concerns will often emerge around the problem, such as issues with self-esteem or self-image.
Sexual anxiety does not always present with physiological symptoms and can instead rest purely with psychological symptoms impacting behavior. For example, fears around performance may lead to a retreat from sexual activity altogether rather than face the possibility of a negative experience.
How Medication Can Affect Your Sex Life
In an unfortunate Catch-22, the very same medications that treat anxiety can also lower your sex drive. Altman said that doctors will often prescribe SSRIs selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors to treat anxiety. However, too much serotonin can decrease your libido and make it harder to orgasm.
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No Shame In Accepting Sex As An Anxiety Treatment
Sex, masturbation, orgasm and even arousal all have various biological effects on our brains and, therefore, our moods. Any distraction from anxiety will, in some way, give us relief. Some people reject the idea of sex as an anxiety treatment and see it as being a standalone activity.
However, just as some folks turn to coffee, smoking, food, or exercise to relieve the symptoms of anxiety, some of us, myself included, will turn to sex. And, just as some will be judged by others for drinking too much coffee or eating too much food, some will be judged for having sexual relations.
Sex, in all its forms, is a very personal decision. The ultimate choice to try anything to reduce anxiety is entirely yours. For me, and many people with anxiety disorders, achieving orgasm is a natural and helpful anxiety reducer. If you havent considered it, I strongly encourage you to do so.
Rewires Your Brain To Pixels On A Screen
Theres another thing you need to know about dopamine. Dopamine is mostly our motivation and go after it neurotransmitter, but it is also the learning neurotransmitter
in other words, it teaches your brain WHERE the reward lies.
So if you constantly keep fapping to porn, your are in essence teaching your arousal center in the brain to become more aroused by pixels on a screen then by real life women. You should know that, for some guys, this rewiring can even become so severe that it leads to complete erectile dysfunction in real life
in other words, when they finally get with a real woman, they shockingly notice that there is little to no libido and, in worst case scenario, no response in their nether regions at all. This new phenomenon is called P.I.E.D, which stands for porn induced erectile dysfunction.
Now, the rewiring is not an on/off switch, meaning it happens gradually and it can range all the way from you being just mildly affected to semi effected to severely effected and people who are mildly affected will almost always get hit by performance anxiety in the bedroom. People who are severely effectedwell, they cant even perform at all!
Lets move on to the third way
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Performance Anxiety And Erectile Dysfunction
Right now, there isnt a lot of research on the physical effects of performance anxiety. However, one study from 2005 shows that performance anxiety is one of the factors most closely linked to sexual dysfunction in both men and women.
A more recent study from 2020 also found that sexual performance anxiety causes or maintains most common sexual dysfunction.
Sweet Pain Relief Even From Menstrual Cramps
Just looking at your partner or even a photo of your partner can help ease pain. In another study published in PLoS One that was performed at Stanford University in California, anesthesiologists showed participants photos of their romantic partners or photos of attractive strangers, or asked them to engage in a word game. They found that looking at romantic partners significantly dulled the experience of pain. So even though you might think pain is a barrier to sex, consider this a sex benefit worth the time and effort: Take a moment to really look at your lover.
Other studies have found that women may get some relief from menstrual cramps through a good orgasm.
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Spectatoring Or Sexual Performance Anxiety
One way that sexual anxiety makes itself known during a sexual encounter is in what we call âspectatoringâ: watching yourself as if from above, disconnected from whatâs going on, trying to manage how your partner experiences you, rather than being present in the moment. In todayâs society, most of our ideas about what sex is, or âshouldâ be, come from Hollywood or porn, so itâs probably not surprising that sexual performance anxiety is one of the most common sexual complaints, affecting up to 25% of men and up to 16% of women, and is associated with many different sexual dysfunctions, including lack of desire.
Feeling self-conscious about your body or how it works, comparing yourself to other people your partner may have slept with or how you used to look, or worrying about disappointing your partner – sexual performance anxiety is completely normal, and it often comes with a sense of shame, which can be deeply uncomfortable. These kinds of thoughts are also a roadblock to sexual desire, sexual arousal, and intimacy. In fact, if you take just one message away from this article, let it be this: itâs practically impossible to become aroused, or engage fully in the moment of sexual intimacy if youâre caught up in sexual performance anxiety, and the critical thoughts that come with it. It just wonât happen, because your body and mind need safety and relaxation before they can open up to the possibility of sex.
Your Immune System May Get Weaker
Weekly sex seems to boost your immune system compared to those who have it less often. Part of the reason may be that it raises levels of a germ-fighting substance called immunoglobulin A, or IgA. But more is not always better here. People who had sex more than twice a week had lower levels of IgA than those who had no sex.
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Causes Of Sexual Performance Anxiety
Sex is more than just a physical response. Your emotions have something to do with it, too. When your mind is too stressed out to focus on sex, your body can’t get excited either.
Lots of different worries can lead to the problem:
- Fear that you won’t perform well in bed and satisfy your partner sexually
- Poor body image, including concern over your weight
- Problems in your relationship
- Worry that your penis won’t “measure up”
- Concern about ejaculating too early or taking too long to reach orgasm
- Anxiety about not being able to have an orgasm or enjoy the sexual experience
These things may lead your body to release stress hormones like epinephrine and norepinephrine.
May Make Prostate Cancer Less Likely
Going for the gusto may help ward off prostate cancer.
Men who ejaculated frequently were less likely to get prostate cancer during one study, which was published in the Journal of the American Medical Association.
You dont need a partner to reap this benefit: Sexual intercourse, nocturnal emission, and masturbation were all part of the equation.
It’s not clear that sex was the only reason that mattered in that study. Lots of factors affect cancer risk. But more sex wont hurt.
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Sex & Bipolar: How Theyre Connected
Impulse control disorders like bipolar can cause people to be and feel out of control with sexuality, says Kort. Bipolar disorder commonly affects a persons sex life by increasing libido during episodes of mania. This heightened sexuality may even receive a diagnosis of hypersexuality, or compulsive sexual behavior, which is associated with an increased incidence of risky sexual behaviors.
During a manic episode, your sexual behavior may become impulsive and you may engage in behaviors that are not ordinary for you, explains Brito. For example, engaging in sexual activities with anonymous partners or more than one partner. You may masturbate or watch porn more than you wish, have an affair.
One of the core symptoms of having a hypomanic episode is having a high sex drive. Its almost right up there with maxing out your credit card, adds Dr. Moody. Its due to having all that energy inside of you, and sex is one of the ways it gets expended.
On the flip side, if you are experiencing symptoms of depression, you may experience the opposite and have a low sex drive, fatigue, worthlessness, shame, stressed, and feel worried about not wanting to sexually connect with others, says Brito.
Does Nofap Help With Performance Anxiety In The Bedroom Conclusion And Final Words
To sum everything up, NoFap can help your performance anxiety in the bedroom, no doubt, and as youve learned in this article it does it in several ways. By cutting out the images of those muscular sex gods from your subconscious mind and by reversing the addiction related brain changes you developed from years of fapping to porn
in addition to that, I hope you found the rest of the article informative as well.
Why not give NoFap a try?
Its not like youll lose anything by trying. If it doesnt work, you can always go back to your old life
if you somehow found that more fulfilling.
Thank you for reading!
P.S. If you found the article informative, consider subscribing to my YouTube channel for more NoFap content. You can do so
P.P.S. Are you struggling? to discover what kind of help Im currently offering.
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It Keeps You From Being Body Confident
Getting naked in front of someone for the first time is nerve-racking for everyone. But when you have anxiety, you’re more likely to feel intensely self-conscious, and you’re more apt to obsess about so-called body flaws. Women can be self-conscious about their body shape in general, or about a particular part, like their breasts, or about the way they smell, taste or perhaps move, says Steinberg. When you have anxiety, that self-consciousness is heightened.
If women are continually being self-critical of themselves due to body shame, they shut down the ability to receive sexual pleasure fully and are unable to be fully present emotionally and physically during sexual scenarios, says Sari Cooper, director of Center for Love and Sex in New York City.
Try Some Aerobic Activity
During periods of anxiety, your body is filled with adrenaline. Putting that adrenaline toward aerobic activity can be a great way to improve your anxiety. Exercise has numerous advantages for controlling your anxiety symptoms:
- Exercise burns away stress hormones that create anxiety symptoms.
- Exercise tires your muscles, reducing excess energy and tension.
- Exercise releases endorphins in your brain which can improve overall mood.
- Exercise is linked to healthier breathing.
- Exercise is a healthy distraction.
Aerobic activity, like light jogging or even fast walking, can be extremely effective at reducing the severity of your anxiety symptoms, as well as the anxiety itself.
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Sex & Adhd: How Theyre Connected
Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder is a neurodevelopmental condition that can cause impulsive behavior, hyperactivity, and difficulty paying attention. Two commonly reported and increasingly studied sexual symptoms of ADHD are hypersexuality and hyposexuality , though neither are recognized as diagnostic criteria for ADHD.
We know that with ADHD if a person is interested in something thats where theyre going to spend most of their time and focus. Sometimes thats the case with sex and porn, says Kort. From a mental health perspective, that can sometimes look like a separate addiction. Sure enough, studies have shown that hypersexuality and ADHD are common co-occurring conditions and that ADHD can even exacerbate the severity of hypersexuality in both sexes.
On the other hand, if a person with ADHD isnt as interested in sex, they might not have the energy, desire, or focus to engage in sexual activities. Either sexual symptom can end up causing issues for intimate relationships.