You Avoid Your Phone Once Youve Sent A Text
When you do text someone, you instinctively put your phone face down and get away from it. The anxiety of whether or not the person will respond becomes too overwhelming. And it only grows with every passing minute. You are overwhelmed by text messages, not only the ones you receive but also the ones you send.
If you found yourself nodding at most of these signs, you dont need to take the texting anxiety test to know if youre afflicted. You most definitely are. Which brings us to the all-important question How do I stop texting anxiety?
Related Reading:6 Relationship Problems Millennials Bring Up The Most In Therapy
How To Know If You Have A Phone Phobia
Phone anxiety is a common fear among those with social anxiety disorder . Many people may not like talking on the phone, or may even have a “phone fear.” But when your hesitance to make and receive calls causes you to experience symptoms such as severe anxiety, shortness of breath, or a racing heart, you may actually have phone phobia.
Identify Your Worst Fear
Coming to terms with your worst fear starts with identifying it.
Common worries may be:
- Losing your train of thought
- Worrying that you wonât sound articulate
- Fear that the person on the other line will misunderstand or reject your request
The sooner you can pinpoint exactly what it is thatâs causing your anxiety, the sooner you can work to address it.
Again, if youâre afraid youâll forget what to say, jot your thoughts down prior to the call. Set the stage to make your call as comfortable as possible.
Don’t Miss: Can Social Media Cause Anxiety
Pick A Face To Talk To
Yes, I fully realize this sounds ridiculous. But somehow, it works. Just talking into the void feels much weirder than having someone to speak to, even if someone is a little cat face I jotted on a napkin. My preferred situation is to put a face I feel friendly about on my computer screen to speak to. For social calls, sometimes I put up a photo of the person Im actually phoning for non-social calls my favorites are Lizzo or Stanley Tucci because they add a little spice to the situation… but honestly, anyone works, including your dog, an alien you draw on an index card, or anything else with a face.
Its Not About The Phone Itself But Its Something About The Interaction
Its not about the phone itself, but its something about the interaction, she says. For some clients, the phone is another place where they might say the wrong thing.
One of Isenstadts 27-year-old patients, who works in sales, worries about stumbling over her words or taking too long to respond, making her look foolish in front of clients and colleagues in nearby cubicles.
Those who suffer from telephobia might send dozens of text messages a day, but get shivers when they need to talk on the phone
Another patient, a 52-year-old financial consultant, also worried about being judged and appearing unintelligent during phone calls. Instead, she defaulted to communicating with clients over email so that she could take time to compose and double check her responses.
Sales trainer Jeff Shore says that many sales professionals fear cold calling because they worry about harassing potential clients. As telemarketing took off, the phone started to be seen as a nuisance that interrupted family dinners and other personal time. Shore says that he works with people in sales who worry about annoying people.
Sales people say I dont want to get those annoying phone calls, says Shore. They say, I dont want to be that person.
Navigating cultural norms
In some cultures, people are apprehensive about talking on the phone, says Michael Landers, global director of Culture Crossing, a consultancy which advises groups and individuals working in a global context.
Recommended Reading: How To Love Someone With Anxiety And Depression
Why Are You Afraid Of Cold Calling
Many salespeople just like you know all too well that overwhelming feeling of panic when it comes to making that first cold call on Monday morning. While anticipating the dreaded call, you find yourself getting jittery or avoiding the situation altogether. Eventually, when you cant put it off a second longer, you reluctantly dial the prospects phone number, bracing for the worst.
One of the most common reasons cold calling can be so stressful is the fear of rejection. To succeed in B2B sales, you must be able to overcome this fear. Fortunately, there are some tricks you can use to come out on top.
Check out our guide How to Cold Call, Connect, Convert, and Crush on the Phone.
Stage : Taking The Plunge
This is the call.
You dial the number. You count each ring, and as time passes you hope that maybe no one will answer, but, of course, someone does. Its their job to.
You say hello, feeling your heart tightening in your chest, and a little part of you might go numb for self-preservation. You read through your script, cringing at inevitable lulls and imperfections, like when they cant hear you well or misunderstand your order.
Your voice might shake, and your hands might tremble, but you get through it.
Recommended Reading: How Can I Help My Child With Social Anxiety
People Dont Have The Need To Call As Often As Before
Before there was social media, the Internet, or even the cell phone, there was the telephone. It was the most convenient form of communication, so people did it often back in the day.
As technology improved, so did the convenience of talking to people from all over. We went from calls to texts, and then from texting to instant messaging.
Since its not often required to call these days, people have become unused to phone calls. Not doing something often causes people to feel uncomfortable when they actually have to do it.
Coping And Avoidance Strategies
Coping strategies may consist of planning the conversation ahead of time and rehearsing, writing or noting down what needs to be said. Anxiety may be lessened by having privacy in which to make a call, so that the sufferer need not be concerned about the conversation being overheard.
Associated avoidance behaviour may include asking others to take phone calls and exclusively using answering machines. The rise in the use of electronic text-based communication has given many sufferers alternative means of communication that they may find considerably less stressful than the phone. At the same time, members of a younger generation who have grown up with digital communication increasingly find both making or receiving phone calls “intrusive”, preferring to use media that allow them to “participate in the conversation at the pace choose”. In the 2019 survey, 61% of UK millennial office workers reported that they would “display physical, anxiety-induced behaviours when they’re the only ones in the office and the phone rings”.
Sufferers may find it helpful to explain the nature of the phobia to friends, so that a failure to respond to messages is not misinterpreted as rudeness or an unwillingness to communicate.
Read Also: What To Take For Stress And Anxiety
Importance Of Phone Calls
Youd think with the rise of email, texting, messaging, and chat, the phone would have declined in importance. Yet, its instead become more valuable than ever for sales teams as a way to immediately connect with prospects and customers.
But what if making calls causes you anxiety? Its not an uncommon problem in spite of the stereotype of the extroverted sales rep.
If you feel anxiety while making phone calls to potential customers, then starting a constructive conversation to possibly close a sale may not happen. Even setting up an appointment can prove to be challenging.
But there are ways to overcome that innate unease.
An Extremely Introverted Personality
Sometimes, an avoidance of the phone has a much simpler explanation, like being extremely introverted. Introverts make up an estimated 25%-40% of the population and tend to focus more on internal thoughts, feelings, and moods rather than seeking out external stimulation.
With the rise of digital communication, the use of telephone calls has become less common as texting and email have taken over. Many introverted people prefer this type of communication because it’s less intrusive than a call and it allows them to avoid social formalities such as small talk â which may be draining for extreme introverts.
Digital communication also allows introverts to better manage their conversations so that they can have time to reflect before giving a response. This can bring a sense of comfort, while being put on the spot on a phone call can be anxiety-inducing.
Don’t Miss: Does Anxiety Cause High Blood Pressure
Why Does The Phone Strike Fear Into The Hearts Of So Many Of Us
Your hands are clammy, your heart is racing and you have a lump in your throat. No, youre not in love, you are experiencing phone jitters. Lets be honest: few people say theyre completely at ease on the phone. Everyones got one or two colleagues who will happily break the relative calm of an open-plan office to put their feet up on their desk and loudly make phone calls. Rest assured, theyre in the minority. According to a study by Faceforbusiness , a telephone answering service, out of 500 participants, 62% said they felt anxious before answering a phone call. That fear seems to be even stronger among millennials. Of the generation born with an iPhone in their hands, 76% said they experience dread on hearing the phone ring. But the professional world isnt ready to do without the telephone just yet whether its for a job interview or a client meeting. So its better to be comfortable using a phone, especially in this era of lockdowns and remote work. With this in mind, we asked: Why do some people hate phones so much? Whats going on in their heads before they have to make a call? And how can they overcome this phobia? This is what we learned.
You Are Prone To Text Regret
Despite all the overanalyzing, you regret a text message as soon as you hit the send button. Thats why you tend to unsend or delete messages that have been delivered but not read A LOT. You are always in two minds about sending a text and you are never sure even after sending it. You get nervous to text him or her when you are dating, always thinking if you are writing the right thing.
Don’t Miss: What To Say To People With Anxiety
Dedicate A Calendar Block Each Day And Be Persistent
Our research showed that, overall, 54% of initial meetings require more than five touch points to set up — and that 10% require 11 or more touches. The one thing that we know for sure is consistency is key in prospecting. Calendar management and calendar blocking are key to success. So, look at your calendar and block out times for calls and your other outreach, and then stick to it, each day.
Our study also revealed that most people underestimate the number of touches required to get through to a prospect. At the same time, sales reps over-report the number of times they actually reach out, by about 50%. In tandem, this diminished effort will deliver diminished results.
Stage : The Fear Begins
This is the moment the fear begins creeping in, your chest tightens and your fight-or-flight instinct kicks in.
Maybe your mother is handing the phone to you, asking you to say something to your grandma. Or your dentist will only schedule appointments by phone. Youre not sure how much longer you can stare down that call screen
This is the moment you realize youre going to have to talk on the phone.
Recommended Reading: Why Do I Have Relationship Anxiety
Are You Scared Of Talking On The Phone
If so, let us know your thoughts on our tips or if you have any of your own that you would like to share. Similarly, if you used to have phone anxiety but have overcome it, let us know how you did it.
I personally just bit the bullet and forced myself to make phone calls and it became much easier for me, and it can for you too!
Common Reasons & Examples Of Phone Anxiety
Whether you are dealing with a generalized fear of the phone or a specific conversation that is to be had over the phone, there are all sorts of reasons why people develop feelings of stress and anxiety with regards to phone calls. Some common reasons and examples why people may experience anxiousness in these situations might include:
- Relationship phone call
- Worried that your relationship is on the rocks and you are waiting to hear back from your partner about the future of the relationship
- If seeking a relationship, waiting for the potential partner to call you back
- Waiting to have a much anticipated conversation with a friend who you had a disagreement with
Don’t Miss: Can Low Testosterone Cause Anxiety
Phone Anxiety In The Modern World
Having so many ways to communicate without actually having to speak to other people means when we do have to speak to them in real life, it can be difficult. Enter phone anxiety: a fear of talking on the phone.
It may sound like a silly idea, but plenty of people have it and you may even be one of them. Do you let your phone go straight to voicemail and then send a text message, claiming you missed their call?
Do you avoid making phone calls and prefer to send emails or texts instead, convincing yourself its quicker and easier for yourself to do so? If that sounds like you, you may well have phone anxiety.
Prepare A Note And Rehearse It
Phone calls are often long, but even if they are short and abrupt, you can prepare notes or a script about the entire conversation before you speak to make the call go more smoothly. You can also create a more structured script with bullet points that you want to hit during the call. It includes some pointers like –
Brief overview and common pleasantries
Your question to the person you’re talking to
Solution or answer
Schedule for wrapping up.
Also Check: Does Anxiety Raise Blood Pressure