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How To Deal With A Partner With Anxiety

Anxiety Robs You Of Joy

How To Deal With Relationship Anxiety

Experiencing joy requires a sense of safety or freedom. Anxiety makes us feel either fearful or limited. Also, a brain and body trained to stress may have a much harder time enjoying sex and intimacy. Negative thoughts and fears impact a persons ability to be present within a relationship, potentially sucking the joy out of a moment.

so dont take yourself too seriously. You can use your sense of humor to overcome anxiety. Remember to laugh and play with your partner. Joy physically heals and comforts your brain in ways that are vital for a healthy relationship.

Dont Make Assumptions About Your Partners Anxiety

Good communication is important. It can be easy to assume that you know what your partner is thinking or needs during an anxious period. While you may be trying to help it can often be the wrong thing to do you should ask what would be helpful. Sometimes your partner will take their anxiety out on you it doesnt mean they dont love you, just that they are in crisis.

How Do You Talk To Someone With Anxiety

Do keep lines of communication open. When it comes to helping someone with anxiety, it is important to keep an open line of communication with them. Do look after yourself. Dont constantly talk about their anxiety. Dont enable their anxieties. Dont put pressure on them. Dont get frustrated. Dont expect immediate change.

Read Also: How To Relieve Anxiety In Chest

Do: Manage Your Reactions To The Anxiety Or A Panic Attack

When youre dating someone with anxiety, during their breaking point, you may think that its a personal attack on you or its an act of rejection or selfishness towards you. But its not. Its not an attempt to create a distance to break your relationship.

Make sure youre aware of how to manage your reactions in front of your partner. It will be helpful to avoid shouting and avoid what triggers your partners anxious state. It helps if you could sit down and talk about supporting them the next time they get panic attacks. You need to be on the same page to make this relationship work.

Can Anxiety Ruin Relationships

How to deal with your partner if s/he has separation anxiety?

When someone lives with anxiety, their life becomes increasingly restricted so that negative, anxious thoughts and beliefs become paramount. As the focus of the relationship, anxiety wedges itself between the partners, blocking their view of each other. When people lose sight of each other because of anxious ideas and behaviors, anxiety ruins the relationship.

Anxiety has been shown to increase relationship problems. People living with generalized anxiety disorder , for example, are more prone than those without GAD to experience relationship problems, including divorce . According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America , people with GAD are twice as likely as those without anxiety to have at least one significant relationship problem and are three times more likely to avoid intimacy.

Intimacy is a vital component of healthy relationships. Avoiding it due to anxiety , can be a deal-breaker. Its not just GAD that interferes in relationships and causes their demise. Any anxiety disorder can do this as can anxiety that doesnt meet the diagnostic criteria for a disorder. Essentially, any type of anxiety can ruin relationships.

Recommended Reading: What Does Anxiety And Depression Feel Like

Don’t Put Pressure On Them

While it is important for you to not enable their behaviours, it is also imperative that you dont force the person to go to places or enter scenarios that they are extremely anxious about.

This is something that they should work gradually towards with professional therapeutic support. If you attempt to push them too far, it could damage the trust in your relationship and cause them a significant amount of stress.

What To Do When Your Partner Gives You Anxiety

Get expert help and advice if your partner gives you anxiety. to chat online to someone right now.

Its never fun to feel stressed and anxious.

Its even more uncomfortable when its your partner whos causing or triggering these feelings inside you.

After all, this is the person youve chosen to be your life companion if theyre making you feel anxious and uncomfortable, who do you turn to for support?

And furthermore, how can you have a fulfilling relationship with someone who is causing you distress?

These feelings can come up for a variety of different reasons, and its important to be able to differentiate between them. After all, theres a big difference between a cause and a trigger when it comes to emotional responses.

Your partner may directly cause you stress and upset with their behavior, but they may also trigger those same feelings by saying or doing something innocent that reminds you of a past trauma.

Lets look at some causes first

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Never Forget That We Love You

Sometimes anxiety can evolve into rage or depression. Its a shape-shifter it takes on a lot of different forms. But in the midst of a bad episode or a difficult time, do not forget that we love you, we care about you, and we appreciate you more than you know. We appreciate you for standing by us when we are at our worst. Our supporters motivate us to keep growing and changing when things seem impossible. And having someone there who genuinely is interested in your well-being and happiness makes the whole managing thing easier. Thank you for everything that you do. We love you.

About the author

Native Texan, lover of all things rap and hip-hop, and gluten-free food connoisseur. In my free time, I enjoy playing …

Read more articles from Adelaide on Thought Catalog.Learn more about Thought Catalog and our writers on our about page.

Sharing Your Faith With Grace And Purpose

8 Tips For Supporting A Partner With Anxiety | Spouse Depression Help

You can confidently and lovingly share your faithyou just need to learn some new tactics to do so! In this Focus on the Family Daily Broadcast, apologist Greg Koukl outlines the Columbo tactic of asking questions, the self-defeating argument tactic to find holes in your opponents arguments, and other specific methods for engaging in faith-building conversations with others. Greg pulls from his over 30 years of experience debating atheists and agnostics to help you share your faith with grace and truth.

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Listen To What They Need

Often after doing some research, we are filled with great ideas of how to help our friends and loved ones who are struggling with anxiety. Unfortunately, anxiety isnt always one-size-fits-all. The most helpful approach is to listen and ask questions to help explore options, rather than jump in with solutions.

Helpful questions include:

  • What would you find most helpful right now?
  • Can you think of anything that would help this to feel more manageable?
  • Are you interested in my opinion or some of my suggestions?

Help Them Reframe Their Anxious Thoughts

Often people with anxiety tend toward catastrophic thinking, making assumptions that the worst-case scenario will happen. It is always possible that the worst could happen however, its also important to consider alternatives. Whats the best case scenario? Whats the likely scenario or the most realistic scenario?

Its important for the anxious person to feel prepared for the possibility of the worst-case scenario, but it is not helpful to ruminate or become excessively preoccupied. Instead, help them discover their inner strengths and external resources that will help them deal with lifes curveballs.7

Recommended Reading: How Can I Control My Anxiety

Learning How To Better Communicate About The Anxiety

Anxiety can be scary. It can make you want to avoid talking about it.

Nonetheless, one of the most effective ways to cope with anxiety in a relationship is to talk about it openly, honestly and directly with your partner.

Having candid talks together on what they are feeling and validating those feelings is paramount, said therapist Daryl Cioffi.

To show your partner you accept their anxiety, you need to encourage them to open up about it. Try to listen without judging, becoming defensive or taking their anxiety personally. Provide reassurance and have empathy towards the situation.

If you start to observe that your partner seems more anxious you should address this with them. This might allow them to share with you why they feel anxious. said Bisma Anwar, LMHC

Encourage Your Partner To Seek Help

How to Deal with Stress with Your Spouse

If your partners anxiety is impacting their lives, as well as your relationship, you may want to consider encouraging them to get help. You want to frame this as kindly and empathetic as possible.

Your partner doesnt need to be fixed, but rather, you want to communicate that getting help will be an empowering and positive thing so that they can feel better.

The two most effective treatments for anxiety are therapy and medication. Some people benefit from therapy alone but often, therapy combined with medication is most helpful.

The most common types of therapy used to treat anxiety are Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Exposure Therapy. Medications used to treat anxiety include anti-anxiety medications such as benzodiazepines, antidepressants , and beta-blockers.

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How To Date Someone With Anxiety

This article was co-authored by Liana Georgoulis, PsyD. Dr. Liana Georgoulis is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist with over 10 years of experience, and is now the Clinical Director at Coast Psychological Services in Los Angeles, California. She received her Doctor of Psychology from Pepperdine University in 2009. Her practice provides cognitive behavioral therapy and other evidence-based therapies for adolescents, adults, and couples.There are 14 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been viewed 54,449 times.

While anxiety disorders are common and manageable, dating someone with anxiety can still be challenging. While you should provide support, you still need to set and enforce clear boundaries. Sometimes, striking a balance between pushing them and supporting them isn’t easy. With patience, open communication, and the help of a mental health professional, you and your partner can find that balance together.XTrustworthy SourceNational Institute of Mental HealthInformational website from U.S. government focused on the understanding and treatment of mental illness.Go to source

Helping Them Manage A Panic Attack

  • 1Remind your partner that their feelings of panic will pass. Tell them that you understand theyre experiencing something overwhelming and frightening. Let them know that theyre safe, that their feelings of anxiety or panic will not last forever, and that theyll feel better soon.XTrustworthy SourceNational Health Service Public healthcare system of the UKGo to source
  • Say, “I know this is difficult, and catching your breath and relaxing may seem impossible. Remember that this will pass. Youre safe, youre going to be okay and, if you want, Ill be right here until it passes.”
  • 2Ask your partner how you can help. If youve never experienced symptoms of an anxiety disorder, acknowledge that you dont completely understand what a panic attack is like. Instead of telling your partner to calm down or trying to assume what they need, ask them what you can do to help.XResearch source
  • Tell them, “Ive never had a panic attack, but I know its not as simple as just willing yourself to relax. What can I do to help you get through it?” Everyone is different, but they might ask you to breathe with them, help them visualize soothing scenery, or simply sit by them and hold their hand.
  • During an anxious state, your partner might not be able to clearly communicate what they need. Its wise to discuss what you should do to help when theyre not in the midst of a panic attack. They could also write a list of helpful actions for you.
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    Mothers And Sons: Being A Godly Influence

    Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

    Anxiety Is The Opposite Of Acceptance

    How To Help Your Spouse Deal with Anxiety

    A healthy form of worry will tell you something isnt right it comes via that quick pull at your heart or that tight feeling in your stomach. This signal helps you act, such as when you speak up for someone who is being treated poorly.

    Unhealthy levels of anxiety make you feel as though an emotional rock is in your stomach almost all the time. Anxiety causes you to reject things that are not dangerous and avoid things that might benefit you. It also can stop you from taking healthy action to change things in your life that are hurting you because it makes you feel hopeless or stuck.

    so practice being uncomfortable. You dont need to either ignore or obsess over an uncomfortable thought. Take constructive action if you can. Sometimes your partner just needs you to be present with his or her feelings, and sometimes you need to offer that same gift to yourself. You can show your presence to your partner with soft eyes or a soft touch, and be present for yourself with a calming breath.

    Recommended Reading: Can Low Blood Sugar Cause Anxiety

    Encouraging Your Partner To Try Individual Or Couples Therapy

    When you care for someone, its tempting to support them by trying to act as a surrogate therapist. The problem is youre not a therapist. Trying to play that role will be emotionally draining. It could make you resent your partner.

    You are not responsible for providing therapy to your partner. This is why you should gently guide your partner toward professional help. A therapist can help them improve how they deal with anxiety, in and outside a relationship.

    If youre in a serious, long-term relationship, consider couples counseling. An anxiety issue might be based on what is going on within your relationship.

    Getting professional help by working with a couples counselor can take the pressure off your partner. Rather than encouraging them to do something on their own, you are inviting them to join you in therapy.

    What happens in couples counseling?

    In couples counseling, you and your partner will gain insight into your relationship, learn how to effectively resolve conflicts, and improve your overall relationship satisfaction through various therapeutic techniques. Therapists will often assign tasks to the couple so that they can apply the skills learned in therapy in their daily interactions. Most couples conclude therapy with a better understanding of their relational patterns and heightened communication skills, allowing them to continue their relationship in a much healthier, more fulfilling way.

    Do Keep Lines Of Communication Open

    When it comes to helping someone with anxiety, it is important to keep an open line of communication with them.

    If you are able to, see the person regularly as this will help with managing anxiety. Spend one-on-one time with them so that they have opportunities to talk about anything they feel anxious about. You can also keep in touch over the phone, video or phone calling them once a week, or sending a text every few days just to see how their week is going.

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