Create Goals That Are Musts
Oftentimes the process of overcoming fear becomes stymied by uninspiring or elusive goals we set for ourselves. To turn this around, ask yourself: What does the life you desire and deserve look like? Is it just a someday, maybe plan or do you actively work toward it? Is it something that is attainable and youre willing to commit to? The first step in overcoming fear is identifying whether or notyoure creating a compelling goal. If you accomplish this, will you feel fulfilled? Conversely, if you dont accomplish this, will you be lost?
Dig deeper into your goal. What is your ideal outcome? Is it financial growth more money in the bank? Maybe you want the financial independence to travel anytime, anywhere? Consider what your life will look like if you dont achieve this outcome and compare it to what your life will look like if you do. Once you feel that your goal is essential, the fear of not trying at all eclipses the fear of failure thats when youll be inspired to act.
Learn To Sing Properly
If you are just starting out, make sure you learn proper singing technique. Not only will your singing improve, you will also feel more confident in your voice, which in turn will lead you to sound even better.
You can work on the basics on your own, but you would be much better off working with a vocal coach. If you are serious about singing, you will need to hire one eventually anyway, so it just makes sense to get one from the start. Not only will a coach help you progress much faster, they will also ensure you never waste time practicing bad techniques.
How To Overcome Social Anxiety Disorder Tip : Challenge Negative Thoughts
While it may seem like theres nothing you can do about the symptoms of social anxiety disorder or social phobia, in reality, there are many things that can help. The first step is challenging your mentality.
Social anxiety sufferers have negative thoughts and beliefs that contribute to their fears and anxiety. These can include thoughts such as:
- I know Ill end up looking like a fool.
- My voice will start shaking and Ill humiliate myself.
- People will think Im stupid
- I wont have anything to say. Ill seem boring.
Challenging these negative thoughts is an effective way to reduce the symptoms of social anxiety.
Step 1: Identify the automatic negative thoughts that underlie your fear of social situations. For example, if youre worried about an upcoming work presentation, the underlying negative thought might be: Im going to blow it. Everyone will think Im completely incompetent.
Step 2: Analyze and challenge these thoughts. It helps to ask yourself questions about the negative thoughts: Do I know for sure that Im going to blow the presentation? or Even if Im nervous, will people necessarily think Im incompetent? Through this logical evaluation of your negative thoughts, you can gradually replace them with more realistic and positive ways of looking at social situations that trigger your anxiety.
Recommended Reading: Can Anxiety Cause Dizziness All Day
Challenge Your Anxious Thoughts
You are often thinking about how badly things will go. For example, you predict that you will fall apart and make a fool of yourself. You predict that everyone will notice that you are sweating–and that they will all talk about it. You think it is a catastrophe that your mind will go blank.
You can challenge these thoughts by asking yourself the following: Have you really made a fool of yourself or are you just predicting the same thing over and over? Is it possible that people dont notice your sweating, because they are thinking about what they are going to say? What is the evidence that people talk about your anxiety? How do you know? Why would anyone really care if you are feeling anxious? How is it relevant to them? Have you ever noticed when someone else said, I forgot what I was going to say? Did anything terrible happen? Argue back at these negative thoughts.
How To Practice Deep Breathing
When in social situations, make sure that you are breathing the way that you practiced. In time, this way of breathing will become automatic.
Also Check: How To Help Someone With Postpartum Anxiety
Adopt A Growth Mindset
When youre afraid, you tend to stay in one place. What if you make a mistake? What if you fail? You start to believe you cant progress at all, that youre incapable of it the fear holds you back. One of the most powerful tips to overcome fear and anxiety is to adopt agrowth mindset. Its not about achieving your goals and being perfect every step of the way. No one is ever perfect all the time, so stop striving for that. Its about getting comfortable with what you dont know and continuing anyway this is the foundation of a growth mindset.
As Tony says, No matter how many mistakes you make or how slow your progress, youre still way ahead of everyone who isnt trying. As you work to overcome fear, you will realize that there will be lots of trials and tribulations along the way. As soon as youve accepted that the path to success includes growth and change, youll be one step closer to attaining your goals.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy For Social Anxiety
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy or CBT is considered to be one of the leading psychological treatments for social anxiety. All of our online courses use CBT strategies to help ease symptoms of anxiety and depression. Click below to see if CBT can help you tackle your symptoms to improve the way you feel.
Strategies for Managing Symptoms of Social Anxiety
Cognitive Strategies
People with social anxiety disorder tend to overestimate the likelihood of being judged by other people and underestimate their own worth. Theyre often self-critical, can fixate on their own flaws, and constantly compare themselves to other people. They can also be hyperaware of and embarrassed by the physical symptoms of anxiety, like blushing, sweating, or trembling.
Cognitive strategies help people identify and challenge these kinds of thoughts, and learn new, more helpful ways of thinking. In doing so, these strategies help can people become more confident and self-compassionate.
Behavioural Strategies
Two key features of social anxiety are avoidance and safety behaviours. Avoidance is when you miss out on fun or important experiences because of anxiety, for example, skipping a friends birthday party or an important presentation at work because youre afraid of being judged. Safety behaviours are things you do that help you cope with anxiety, like having a few drinks before you get to a party.
Coping With Symptoms of Social Anxiety
Recommended Reading: What Does Anxiety Feel Like Physically
Try Breathing And Muscle Relaxation Exercises
A tried and tested technique to calm nerves is to do some breathing exercises or muscle relaxation exercises. There are plenty of techniques you can use to calm yourself down, and we have several mindfulness courses that will teach you some of the best methods. You can also take a look at our blog post on meditation for some techniques.
Bonus Public Speaking Tip: Utilize The Powerful Speech Pause
The powerful speech pause might be the most important speaking technique you will ever learn. Not only will it help you overcome your fear of public speaking, but it will help you master your control over the emotional impact of your speeches.
This secret is something that Ive used for many years. In fact, dramatic pauses are so powerful that they should be illegal.
In music, all of the beauty is contained in the silences between the notes. In speaking, the drama and power of the speech is contained in the silences that you create as you move from point to point.
This is an art that you can learn with practice.
Recommended Reading: Why Does Anxiety Cause Dizziness
Practice Mindfulness Techniques And Breathing Exercises
- When you feel signs of social anxiety, experience the negative emotions without judging them or acting on them.
- Stay in the present moment. Focusing on whats happening in the present in your body, in the space around you, in the larger natural environment can really help bring your attention away from the worries you have projected onto the future or past. This simple shift, especially if practiced regularly, can make a very big difference in how you feel.
- Focus on your five senses. Bring your attention back to what your body is feeling, how your breathing feels, and what you are smelling, hearing, touching, and seeing
- Practice meditation regularly. Read our tips on how to make meditation and mindfulness practices work for you.
- When you notice anxiety climbing, focus on taking slow, deep breaths. Quick and shallow breathing happens commonly when we feel anxious but often makes symptoms worse. Take a moment to connect with your breath and allow it to fill your belly and chest. Taking just a few deep breaths can make a big difference in how you feel.
Move Beyond Your Comfort Zone
You may be thinking: But thats the problem. I cant! The trick is in setting manageable goals for yourself.
For example, if youre new to running, you probably wouldnt begin by signing up for a marathon. Instead, you might start by running only a minute at a time and walking for a while, too. The same can apply when dealing with shyness and social anxiety.
Instead of taking on more than you can handle, you might begin by setting a goal you know you can complete. And that will look different for everyone.
For one person, a good first goal might be texting a friend to say hi. For another, it might look like taking a walk around the park when more people are outside.
To identify that kind of a goal, the key is to be honest with yourself about what steps you can take. If you tend to put a lot of pressure on yourself, you might need to scale back the goal to make it more manageable. Or maybe you need to push a bit beyond your comfort zone.
When it comes to identifying whats possible given your own social anxiety or shyness, youre the expert.
Also Check: Do Internal Medicine Doctors Treat Anxiety
What Causes Social Anxiety Disorder
Social anxiety disorder sometimes runs in families, but no one knows for sure why some family members have it while others dont. Researchers have found that several parts of the brain are involved in fear and anxiety. Some researchers think that misreading of others behavior may play a role in causing or worsening social anxiety. For example, you may think that people are staring or frowning at you when they truly are not. Underdeveloped social skills are another possible contributor to social anxiety. For example, if you have underdeveloped social skills, you may feel discouraged after talking with people and may worry about doing it in the future. By learning more about fear and anxiety in the brain, scientists may be able to create better treatments. Researchers are also looking for ways in which stress and environmental factors may play a role.
Talk With A Therapist
Despite what some people might suggest, social anxiety goes beyond shyness, or feeling uneasy and nervous around new people. Social anxiety is a mental health condition, and its not always possible to work through symptoms yourself.
You can do a lot on your own to manage the anxiety and distress you experience, but getting professional support is always a good place to start.
A trained mental health professional can:
- offer more insight on the difference between social anxiety and shyness
- help you identify social anxiety triggers
- teach helpful coping strategies, social skills, and relaxation techniques
- offer guidance with challenging and replacing or reframing negative thoughts
Therapy also offers a safe environment to practice navigating anxiety-provoking situations through graduated exposure, one potential treatment for social anxiety.
Your therapist might recommend group therapy or support groups, which give you the chance to practice social skills and interact with other people also coping with social anxiety.
A therapist can also refer you to a psychiatrist, who can prescribe medication for social anxiety. Medication can provide some relief from severe symptoms, making it easier to start working through them in therapy.
Recommended Reading: What Is The Best Magnesium For Anxiety And Depression
Identify The Emotion Behind Your Idea
Anyone trying to get an idea off the ground needs to ask two questions: “Why am I doing this?” and “Why does it deserve to exist?” If you haven’t articulated those things to yourself, you’re more likely to give up and not endure through difficult business situations. “That emotion has a massive impact, not only on your ability to persist and endure, but also in converting other people into advocates and partners for what you’re doing,” he says.
Find Valuable Insight In Pain
No one likes pain. Most of us go to great lengths to avoid it. But pain is a profound teacher. If you accept that your life and your efforts to achieve your goals will be painful at times, painful experiences become opportunities for growth. When you let go of pain as a threat to your survival, it loses its power and becomes another tool for overcoming fear. Everyone experiences hardships in life. It doesnt matter whether your setbacks are personal or professional what matters are the lessons you take from those experiences and how you apply them to your future. Instead of letting pain and fear dictate your decisions, actively choose to learn from those painful moments to be in control of your own life.
Read Also: Is Online School Good For Social Anxiety
What Is Social Phobia
It’s natural to feel self-conscious, nervous, or shy in front of others at times. Most people get through these moments when they need to. But for some, the anxiety that goes with feeling shy or self-conscious can be extreme.
When people feel so self-conscious and anxious that it prevents them from speaking up or socializing most of the time, it’s probably more than shyness. It may be an anxiety condition called social phobia .