Focus On Your Breathing
As you are going through anxiety, it is important to not hold onto it. Like any stressful moment, it will pass and your mind will clear up. By focusing on the negative, you are allowing it to grow in your mind and get stronger. Use your other coping mechanisms instead like focusing on your breathing. To help against anxiety and to help your physical being not faint or pass out, you need to focus on your breathing. Take deep breaths through your nose and out through your mouth. Try breathing through your stomach instead of your chest as well. Put a hand on your belly and focus on the rise and fall of your stomach as you level out your breathing.Anxiety can be a frightening emotion to go through, but it doesnt need to overpower you. Once you are able to learn the proper coping mechanisms and what is best for you, dont be afraid to use them every time you feel your anxiety start to rise.
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First A Look At What This Coping Style Is Good For
Emotion-focused coping skills help you process and work through unwanted or painful emotions and reactions. In other words, this approach helps you manage your emotions rather than outside circumstances.
This approach wont help you solve a problem directly, but its a great tool to have for dealing with stressful situations you cant change or control.
When you can manage your emotional response to a given situation more effectively, you may feel somewhat better about whats happening or at least more equipped to handle it.
Things Almost Everyone Gets Wrong About Managing Anxiety
It might be helpful to pretend youre blowing out through a straw. Let out a tiny bit of air in a slow and steady stream so that it lasts a really long time.
Repeat this for as long as it takes. If you find your mind gearing up again, re-engage your busywork strategy . If you find yourself feeling ungrounded again, go back to those body sensations. Re-anchor. Start again. Do this until your breath feels more regular, and you can look around the room and notice all the things in it.
Congratulations, you have survived.
The 3 Bs are easy to remember and relatively simple. If you practice them outside of crisis moments, youll be even more likely to remember and use them . And if you train a parent, friend, or partner to slow down and guide you through the process when they see you struggling, youll find even more pervasive relief.
Of course, if you find yourself worried about having another attack in between attacks, and especially if you start avoiding people, places, or things youd otherwise be meeting with, going to, or doing, its probably time to find a professional to help navigate.
In the meantime, try to stay aware of your body so you can catch the earliest hint of anxiety. When your throat starts closing up or your mind suddenly fills with more Is and shoulds and nevers than usual, grab your 3 Bs and go to work.
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Talk With A Therapist
Despite what some people might suggest, social anxiety goes beyond shyness, or feeling uneasy and nervous around new people. Social anxiety is a mental health condition, and its not always possible to work through symptoms yourself.
You can do a lot on your own to manage the anxiety and distress you experience, but getting professional support is always a good place to start.
A trained mental health professional can:
- offer more insight on the difference between social anxiety and shyness
- help you identify social anxiety triggers
- teach helpful coping strategies, social skills, and relaxation techniques
- offer guidance with challenging and replacing or reframing negative thoughts
Therapy also offers a safe environment to practice navigating anxiety-provoking situations through graduated exposure, one potential treatment for social anxiety.
Your therapist might recommend group therapy or support groups, which give you the chance to practice social skills and interact with other people also coping with social anxiety.
A therapist can also refer you to a psychiatrist, who can prescribe medication for social anxiety. Medication can provide some relief from severe symptoms, making it easier to start working through them in therapy.
How To Calm Down Quickly
Something sets you off, and before long, you feel stuck in an endless loop of intrusive thoughts, pondering every possible thing that could go wrong. Your body tenses, your breathing quickens, and you can hear your heartbeat pounding in your ears.
When you feel anxiety kick in like this, its time to calm yourself down. The first step is awareness. Its a good idea to learn to recognize the first signs of anxiety and get to work right away before experiencing an episode.
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What Is The Anxiety Trick
The Anxiety Trick is this: You experience Discomfort, and get fooled into treating it like Danger.
What do we do when were in danger? We only have three things: Fight, Flight, and Freeze. If it looks weaker than me, Ill fight it. If it looks stronger than me, but slower, Ill run away. And if it looks stronger and faster than me, Ill freeze and hope it doesnt see so good. Thats all we have for danger.
When people experience the fear of a panic attack, or a phobic encounter, or an obsessive thought, they instinctively treat it as a danger. They try to protect themselves, with some variation of Fight, Flight, or Freeze.
Tone Your Inner Power Daily
Think of your inner power as a muscle just like any other muscle. The more you use it, the more toned it becomes and the more you are able to accomplish. Every time you practice a healthy life strategy, you actually increase your ability to conquer your anxiety. What you couldnt do yesterday, you can do today. With practice, your new skills will become automatic. This is how you create lasting freedom from anxiety.
In the words of Aristotle: We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.
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Strengthen Your Body And Brain
Lifestyle changes can also be helpful for preventing anxiety and helping you cope with anxiety flares. What you eat, how much you sleep, and your physical activity levels can all have an influence on how you experience anxiety.
Research has found that mood and stress levels can be affected by what you eat. People who consume diets rich in fruits and vegetables, for example, tend to experience lower stress levels.
Research has also found that regular physical activity can be useful for both alleviating and preventing anxiety. One study found that physical exercise had a protective effect against anxiety disorders and significantly reduced symptoms of anxiety.
Sleep can also have a powerful effect on your mental well-being and anxiety levels. Research has found that problems with sleep are one risk factor for developing anxiety disorders, including generalized anxiety disorder. Even short-term disruptions in your sleep may lead to increased levels of stress and anxiety.
Treatment Options For Patients With Anxiety
There are two primary treatments for individuals with anxiety:
- Cognitive behavioral therapy , which involves learning how to lower anxiety and face distressing situations.
- Medication management with antidepressants, which works well on its own but even better when coupled with CBT.
During therapy, continue to show your support by:
- Asking your loved one what you can do to help them.
- Asking if you can attend a therapy session to learn some skills to better support them.
- Making time for your own life and interests to sustain your energy.
- Encouraging your loved one to try another therapist if the first one isnt a good fit.
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Find Ways To Make Use Of Any Insight They Have Into Their Anxiety
If your loved one has insight into their anxiety, you can help them spot when their anxiety-driven patterns are occurring. I find it helpful when my spouse notices that Im expressing my anxiety about work by being irritable with her or by being too fussy. Because we know each others patterns so well and have a trusting relationship, we can point out each others habits. Not that this is always met with grace, but the message sinks in anyway.
Find What Relaxes You
There are already things in your life that relax you. You may find it beneficial to make a list of things you enjoy and that help you to relax so you can reference it when symptoms of anxiety arise. When you notice your anxiety rising turn to those activities to help stop symptoms before they escalate.
For example, if you find that a warm bath is relaxing, don’t wait, draw a bath, maybe light some candles or add a few nice scents and get in. Whether it’s a bath, a shower, skipping stones at a park, getting a massage – if it works, do it right away, rather than allowing yourself to become overwhelmed by your anxiety.
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How Long Can Anxiety Last
Anxiety attacks typically last no more than 30 minutes, with the symptoms reaching their most intense at about halfway through the attack. Anxiety can build up for hours or even days before the actual attack so it is important to take note of factors that contribute to anxiety to effectively prevent or treat them.
How To Deal With Relationship Anxiety
Relationships can be one of the most pleasurable things on the planet but they can also be a breeding ground for anxious thoughts and feelings. Relationship anxiety can arise at pretty much any stage of courtship. For many single people, just the thought of being in a relationship can stir up stress. If and when people do start dating, the early stages can present them with endless worries: Does he/she really like me? Will this work out? How serious is this? Unfortunately, these worries dont tend to subside in the later stages of a romantic union. In fact, as things get closer between a couple, anxiety can get even more intense. Thoughts come flooding in like: Can this last? Do I really like him/her? Should we slow down? Am I really ready for this kind of commitment? Is he/she losing interest?
All this worrying about our relationships can make us feel pretty alone. It can lead us to create distance between ourselves and our partner. At its worst, our anxiety can even push us to give up on love altogether. Learning more about the causes and effects of relationship anxiety can help us to identify the negative thinking and actions that can sabotage our love lives. How can we keep our anxiety in check and allow ourselves to be vulnerable to someone we love?
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Don’t Enable Their Anxieties
When someone has anxiety, they may try to avoid certain places or scenarios. As a result, you may have started to modify your behaviour as well. For example, you may have started to avoid certain places or scenarios too, or may have started taking on tasks to help the person continue with their avoidance.
We understand that this may seem helpful as you are stopping the person from worrying in the short term, but this avoidance can actually have a negative impact on them in the long run. Their continued avoidance can perpetuate their worries and prevent them from recognising that they could actually manage in the scenarios that they are evading.
What Is Approach Anxiety
via: Bigstockphoto / pressmaster
Approach anxiety is that overwhelmingfeeling you get when you can’t convince yourself that approaching a cute girl will yield positive results.
And lots of guys struggle with it.
For me, it was a self-esteem issue that manifested into negative thought patterns. I simply didn’t have the confidence to approach girls…
So how did I fix it? I started improving myself by doing exactly what you’re doing right now It took a while, but I figured out who I am and found my confidence. And so can you!
But I’ve been lucky… I don’t have a diagnosed anxiety disorder.
If you have approach anxiety, it doesn’t necessarily mean you have an anxiety disorder, but having one will make meeting girls immensely more difficult… But not impossible.
So if you’re one of the guys who suffer from social anxiety , it’s completely normal to get help.
Just remember… no matter where your anxiety comes from, it’s absolutely conquerable.
And this is your first step towards getting over it.
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Do A Daily Or Routine Meditation
While this takes some practice to do successfully, mindful meditation, when done regularly, can eventually help you train your brain to dismiss anxious thoughts when they arise.
If sitting still and concentrating is difficult, try starting with yoga, or walking meditation. There are many free guided meditations on apps like InsightTimer that can help you get started.
Realize That She’s Not A Perfect Person
via: Depositphotos / mjth
Many guys associate beauty with other perfect qualities in a way, they instantly assume that since a girl’s face/body is gorgeous, her personality must be, too.
…And that makes them even more nervous to talk to her.
But think about this:
Dont you know men and women who are extremely attractive, yet also extremely stupid, rude, or boring? And… how can you be so sure that this girl isn’t like that?
That beautiful girl is a person with flaws, problems, and insecurities… just like you.
So approach her with that exact mentality . Find out if her personality is as good as her face, and dont be afraid to move on if you quickly find out that its not. If you keep this in mind, a lot of nervousness over the approach immediately vanishes.
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Hanging Out With Friends
Relationships matter even for us introverts, says Stone. Research also tells us that isolating is one of the worst things for anxiety and depression.
So, consider making time for friends, family, and other social engagements.
Put yourself in social situations at least weekly as a part of your self-discipline to help you build community over time, says Stone.
Offer Support But Dont Take Over
Avoidance is a core feature of anxiety, so sometimes we may feel pulled to help out by doing things for our avoidant loved ones and inadvertently feed their avoidance. For instance, if your anxious roommate finds making phone calls incredibly stressful and you end up doing this for them, they never push through their avoidance.
More on Anxiety
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A good general principle to keep in mind is that support means helping someone to help themselves, not doing things for them, which includes virtually anything that stops short of actually doing it yourself. For example, you might offer to attend a first therapy session with your loved one if they set up the appointment. Or, if theyre not sure how to choose a therapist, you might brainstorm ways of doing that, but let them choose.
An exception might be when someones anxiety is accompanied by severe depression. If they cant get themselves out of bed, they may be so shut down that they temporarily need people to do whatever is needed to help them stay alive. Also, sometimes loved ones are so gripped by an anxiety disorder that theyre in pure survival mode and need more hands-on help to get things done. In less extreme circumstances, however, its best to offer support without taking over or overdoing the reassurance.
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Why You Need To Change The Goal Of Your Approach
via: Unsplash / Brendan Church
One huge problem with common approach techniques is that they pressure you to talk to girls that you have absolutely no honest connection with.
Think about it like this:
Everyone’s personality is unique and complex, but if you find women who share personality traits with you, the connection between you will be natural and easy .
…But on the other hand, if you spend hours trying to pick up or talk to completely random girls whose personalities dont connect with yourseveryones time is wasted, and you go home feeling defeated.
I know this one sounds hard, and you probably think that there are no girls who even want connect with you unless you put on a fake, confident front. But heres the thing:
Dont you have guy and girl friends who you just sort of connected with? People who quickly matched your personality… so well that you couldnt help but be friends? Start thinking of women like those friends, and approach them with the mentality of seeking a connection, instead of trying to impress them.
How To Make My Anxiety Go Away
How to calm down quickly Breathe. One of the best things you can do when you start to feel that familiar panicky feeling is to breathe. Name what youre feeling. Try the 5-4-3-2-1 coping technique. Try the File It mind exercise. Think about something funny. Distract yourself. Take a cold shower 22.
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Take Any Prescribed Medications
Depending on the severity of panic attacks, a doctor may prescribe a use-as-needed medication. These medications typically work fast.
However, these drugs can be highly addictive, so people should use them exactly as their doctor prescribes. Taken with opioids or alcohol, they can have life threatening adverse effects.
A doctor may also describe selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, which can help prevent panic attacks from occurring in the first place.